Whether it is the one you came from, the one your inherited in relationship or the one you are trying to create – families are complicated! So often we feel like a failure when we fall into the same patterns we have learned from the family we came from. We can be incredible hard on others when we see things we don’t like, fearing our destiny is going to be just like others in our family tree. We can feel embarrassed and take it personally when our children respond in an adverse way or do not pursue the dreams and ambitions we desired.
The good news is you can’t be exactly the same as your parents. We have a choice to move in the direction we have been taught and conditioned or simply stop, evaluate and intentionally take our next step. Often a few simple changes can literally start to change a family tree.
Family therapy takes a bit of time, but can be rewarding as we set new goals, review some of the family rules and ultimately learn to respect and communicate in age appropriate ways. Seldom is it one step that put us in a place of being dissatisfied, so we must commit to a process of taking the steps needed to move towards health and hope.
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